Love, Sex and Magic
by BL Fairys
Summary: Love troubles? Look no further! The BL Fairy Team has the answer to all of your romantic needs! Yullen,Lucky,Fairly Odd Parents


**Poison-and-Foxglove**- Greetings! Poison here. And welcome to the wonderful world of the brand new conjoined account me and NurikoKurosaki share! I would like to say that you may know me, but I've only written two stories beside this one and I'm only writing half of this one… But if you like this story, you can visit mine and her accounts. We'll be switching off every chapter, so just look for the AN note at the beginning and you'll know who your review goes to. And we do want reviews. Don't be lazy and just read it! Review! Even if you hated it! Tell what you liked, what you didn't like, and ask any questions you like. Now, this story does indeed cross over with Fairly Oddparents. Before you freak out, Timmy, Wanda, and Cosmo don't have roles in this story and it's mostly just the -man cast and our made-up fairies. And for the sake of all our sanities, I ask that you not imagine any of the Fairly Oddparent in their original style. This is first and foremost a –Man story and therefore all fairies are to be imagined in anime form. Please enjoy and review!

**Warnings**- This is a comedy, so be prepared for some ridiculous moments later in the story. Oh, and in case you haven't figured it out already, this is a YAOI and there will be boys loving boys. And I apologize for any mistakes I miss and don't correct. Lastly, I'm sorry for the description overload at the end of the chapter. Introducing made-up characters is always a hassle. It won't happen again.

**Disclaimer**- Neither me nor NurikoKurosaki own -Man, Fairly Oddparents, Bleach, Shugo Chara, or Hercules. They are owned by Katsura Hoshino, Butch Hartman, Tite Kubo and Peach Pit. Although NurikoKurosaki may feel that she is perfectly entitled to own it and its characters, she doesn't. If we did, and our story was part of the manga, Butch Hartman and Katsura Hoshino would lose their minds and sue us. Also we don't own the title which comes from the song Love Sex Magic which is from Ciara and the chapter title is from Hercules.

**Love, Sex, and Magic Ch. 1- I won't say (I'm in love):**

"Agh! You have no idea how much I just want to wring your neck right now!"

Lenalee sighed. Usually, Allen had more self-control.

"Well god damn, you don't have to tell me, Moyashi! I'd like nothing more than to slice your stupid little head off!"

Please stop…

"Well then why don't you? Afraid?"

You're just making it worse.

"Afraid of what? You? Don't make me laugh. I'm just not as hot-headed and rash as an idiot like you."

This isn't helping anything.

"You're the only idiot here!"

Ok, this is getting on my nerves.

"I dare you to say that again, little man!"

No more…

"Oh yeah? I said you're the only—"

SHUT UP!

It took Lenalee a moment to find that her thoughts had finally been voiced and that she'd actually yelled at the two of them. Well, since she'd already done so, there was no point in keeping quiet any longer. She stood up slowly.

"Oh my GOD, you two fight about the same stupid things EVERY SINGLE DAY. Give it a rest. Have some respect for those of us who have to listen to this," she scolded, gesturing to Lavi and herself.

"Oh, well, uh, I don't mind so much, heh," Lavi stuttered when he saw the devil reflected in Kanda's eyes.

"Well I do. Now both of you apologize and let's move on with our lives," Lenalee continued in an asserting tone.

Kanda snorted. "Sorry, Lenalee. But I don't think that day will ever come." He turned and began walking away.

"Ugh! Do you see what a big jerk this guy is?!" Allen stomped off in the other direction, wishing to go off somewhere to cool his head.

After they'd both left, Lenalee plopped back into her chair and held her head in her hands.

"Always a crowd pleaser, eh?" Lavi said, trying to lighten the mood.

"Why is everyone in this place so stupid?" she growled.

Lavi frowned. "Do you want me to go get you some water?"

"Lavi, you see it too, don't you?" she replied, ignoring his question.

He looked down at his lap.

"Yeah."

* * *

"Ah! There you are Lenalee!"

The female exorcist turned to see her white-haired friend jog over to her.

"I've been looking for you. I needed some time to calm down. I wanted to say sorry. I can only imagine how tough it is to put up with our arguing," he said in the polite voice that he used so well.

Lenalee wanted to say that is was ok and let's talk about something else now, but decided to seize her chance. "Then stop arguing," she said bluntly.

Allen gave her a confused look. "That's not something I can exactly promise."

"Why not?" She was not going to cut any corners.

"Well… because people argue. Some people just don't get along and there's nothing to be done about it. And he usually starts it anyway."

"Then why don't you try getting along?"

"I've tried, Lenalee, I've tried. But he's impossible."

"No, you're both impossible. I can't believe it's still going on like this! Do either of you ever take any time for self-reflection?"

Allen cocked his head to one side. "Now you've completely lost me."

She knew it wouldn't work. She waved him off. "Never mind. It's ok, I forgive you. Just… I don't know, try being nice to him. Even when he's not nice to you. For me?"

The white-haired boy hesitated. "I'll try."

Good enough for now, she thought.

* * *

Since she knew Kanda wouldn't approach her, she decided to approach him. She found him training, all of his focus and concentration dead center on any target he chose for Mugen. The look on his face was so intense that she almost felt bad for having to bother him. But after thinking the situation over again, she found that she didn't feel _that _bad.

"Kanda."

As expected he didn't respond. He was waiting for her to give up and leave him alone. But that wasn't about to happen.

"Kan. Da," she tried again stressing the syllables of his last name. Again there was no response.

"Yuu Kanda. Kanda Yuu." She tried saying his name in both the western and the eastern fashion and neither worked. He practiced a near-flawless sweep of his sword.

"GODDAMNIT YUU-CHAN!" she finally screamed. She'd had enough of being ignored.

"What?!" he erupted back. She took a deep breath. She wanted him in a good mood for this conversation.

"I'd like to talk to you. It's important."

"Fine. Shoot."

"I know you're a generally selfish guy, but could you do me a favor?"

"What kind of favor?"

"Could you stop fighting with Allen so much?"

"If he drops dead, then I promise not to fight with him."

"I'm being serious! This is bad, and not just for our work, but for the both of you in general."

"It does me no bodily harm to put that retard in his place."

"You say that, but I think it does."

"What, are you catching his stupid? There's nothing 'important' about this conversation, so if you don't mind." He turned back to his training.

She knew then that she'd lost him. There was no point in her going any further. "Okay, well just think about it. Try and think of him in a different light. I think you'll find something interesting if you do."

"Whatever."

She threw up her hands and left. It was unbelievable how men's minds worked. Especially these two men in particular.

When Lavi saw the look on her face, his face fell. "No luck I'm guessing?"

"Do I ever have any luck? Look, have you tried talking to Kanda about this? You are his best friend."

"That doesn't mean that he won't hesitate to murder me if I even suggest such a thing."

"Well there has to be some way to get the message out there in a way that won't just make them drift from the truth even more."

"Set them up on a blind date?"

"Since when would Kanda accept going on a blind date?"

"Tell each one what the other thinks is nice about them?"

"There's nothing to work with for that plan."

"Put Allen's life in danger?"

"Kanda would let him die."

"Put Yuu's life in danger?"

"Allen would save anyone. It wouldn't mean a thing."

"Well then I'm out."

Lenalee placed her hand thoughtfully on her chin. "I think I might be able to come up with something."

* * *

It had taken a good deal of thought and lack of sleep, but Lenalee thought she finally had things set up the way she wanted. She'd set up the time and place, made the necessary bribes, come up with the necessary excuses, and had Lavi at her beck and call. Of course no plan was flawless and she felt uneasy as she set off to initiate it.

_Please work_, she prayed. _For their sake_.

She checked her clock and was pleased to see that she'd managed to wake up and get ready in time. The hands on the clock read 5:00 which meant that neither of them should be awake yet. They were right where she wanted them.

She decided to take Allen's room first because he was less likely to bite her head off for waking him up. Opening the door a sliver, she slid in and closed the door quietly.

"Allen?" she said in almost a whisper.

There was a rustle of blankets and a white mop top poked out and peered at her with barely open eyes. "Lenalee? What time is it?"

"It's much earlier than you usually get up and I'm sorry. I just wanted to ask you something," she said softly in her cutest, most endearing voice.

"Sure. Whazzit?" he muttered through a yawn.

"When you wake up, could you come straight to breakfast? I've been practicing my cooking lately and I wanted you to be the lucky person to try it out since you love eating so much."

"Food? Eating? Sounds good. I'll do it."

"Thank you! I'll let you go back to sleep now."

"Don't mention it," he slurred out before falling back onto his pillow.

Well that was easy enough, she thought. Now came the hard part. Entering the cave of the beast.

For Kanda, she figured she'd better knock in case he'd decided to get up early. When there was no reply she took a deep breath and slid in just as she'd done into Allen's room. Oh boy.

"Kanda?" She said it so quietly that she barely heard it. "Um, Kanda?"

She received an unhappy grunt in reply.

"I know it's early, but I need to ask you something."

"And this something can't wait two hours?" His rumbling voice sent a shiver down her spine.

"Well, I want you to do something as soon as you wake up, so I thought I should ask before you got up."

"What is it?" His irritation radiated from him like heat from the earth's core.

"Lavi wants to show you something at breakfast, so he was wondering if you could come to that before training this morning."

"And he sent you to ask? Friggin' idiot. Yeah, whatever. I'll go."

"Thank you so much. See you in a while." She bowed her head slightly at him (not that he was looking or anything) and left quickly. She was met by Lavi's expectant eye.

"Well? Did he say yes?"

"Yes, but that was the scariest thing I've ever done! I think I'd rather go fight a horde of akumas!" she said while clutching at her chest where her heart was pounding.

"Hey, if it'd been me, he would have thrown something at me. Or better yet, he would have thrown _me _at _something_. Or out the window."

Lenalee giggled. "I guess it's a hate-love kind of friendship."

"Nah, Yuu-chan loves me. He just doesn't like to show around other people. But we have to go set up now so that everything will be ready."

Lenalee nodded assertively. "Right."

* * *

The memory of sleep still clung to Kanda's eyes as he threw his shimmering ebony hair into a ponytail. He'd strapped Mugen to his side before he remembered that he had been requested to skip training this morning. Just what was so important that that stupid rabbit had to send Lenalee to his room at five in the morning to inform him about it? It was probably something ridiculous and uninteresting. His red-haired friend was usually full of strange surprises that Kanda wanted no part of. Still, Lavi was his friend and it wouldn't hurt to go have a quick look. He kept Mugen at his side, almost positive he wouldn't spend much time entertaining Lavi and his antics and would be training as he did every morning.

The Order was bustling with life and business as he strode down the corridors, his ponytail swinging back and forth. Even the busiest Finders took a moment to greet him and bow their heads at him as he walked by. And that they should. He was a top notch exorcist after all. Not to mention how scary he could get.

He heaved something between a grunt and a sigh as he neared his destination. He could already see that rabbit's stupid grin when he walked in chanting "Yuu-chan! Yuu-chan! Look! Look at this!" Although he had to admit that some of the things the Bookman had showed him in the past had caught his interest. And as cold-hearted as he was, he liked seeing that look of pure joy his friend got when he was showing someone something new.

He almost felt a small smile dance onto his lips, but all thoughts of showing any happiness disappeared in an instant when he saw _him_ walking towards the same direction. It was obvious that he couldn't avoid running into the guy at breakfast, but he'd forgotten and somewhere in the back of his mind he'd denied the Moyashi's existence. Part of what Lenalee has asked him the night before leaked back to him and he decided not to acknowledge Allen. Unfortunately, as the both walked into the cafeteria, Kanda accidently bumped Allen and the smaller boy fell onto his behind.

"Hey! I know you don't like me and you think I'm short, but that doesn't mean that you can just push me over!" Allen shouted.

"I didn't mean to, stupid. It's called an accident, in case you didn't know there were words that big."

"Accident my ass! You love nothing more than pushing me around!"

"Allen! Kanda! So glad you both showed up!" Lenalee butted in before their argument turned into something worse. "Come on over."

Allen remembered that Lenalee had promised food and forgot his quarrel with Kanda immediately. "Oh, right. You said you wanted me to try your cooking," he said.

"Yup. Here you are." She placed a steaming plate of food in front of him and the first bite was in his mouth before the plate had hit the table.

"This is really good! You're amazing Lenalee!"

Kanda turned away from the disgusting image of Allen stuffing his face. "You had something to show me, Lavi?"

"Yeah! I drew a picture of you!" Lavi held up a frightening detailed picture of the Japanese exorcist, but with obvious changes like a chiseled cleft chin and muscles like a Greek god.

"Lavi, that looks nothing like me."

"Sure it does! It's your inner beauty."

"There's nothing beautiful about it. Can I go now?"

Lenalee and Lavi glanced at each other. It was time to initiate phase two. Lenalee's hand flew to her forehead and she began breathing heavily. As she expected, she immediately got both of their attention.

"Are you alright? Do you want to sit down?" Allen asked, forgetting his food.

"Oi, what's wrong?" Kanda followed.

"I'm fine. I just spent a lot of time getting this meal perfect and—"

Like an actress from Hollywood, Lenalee fell to the ground, feigning sickness. Lavi almost wanted to clap, but couldn't without ruining the plan.

"Lenalee! Oh my gosh, what's wrong? Lenalee?" Allen nudged at the female exorcist only for her not to move.

"Oh no! I'll go tell Komui!" Lavi said immediately, running off.

"I'll go with you," Kanda said.

"No!" Lenalee interjected. Kanda turned towards her with a surprised expression. "Please, would you and Allen take me to a bed? I would feel… better…" She purposely made her voice fade in and out.

"Alright." He picked her up. "Where should we take her, Moyashi?"

"Let's go to her room. She might just need water, food, and sleep."

Lenalee tried to keep from grinning as they carried her to her room and placed her in her bed.

"Do you want some water?" Allen asked softly.

"No, I just want to sleep. Could both of you stay by my side? Just in case I wake up and want something."

"Of course." Allen looked at Kanda for his answer.

"I guess if I have to," came his answer.

And then something nice happened. Allen smiled at Kanda and Kanda didn't snap at him. She quickly shut her eyes and pretended to be asleep. The plan was going perfectly and now they had some 'alone time' to realize some hidden feelings.

The silence that followed seemed to go on forever and Lenalee prayed it was because they were waiting to make sure that she was asleep. Finally, Allen broke the silence with "Lenalee?" She didn't answer.

"Oh. I guess she's asleep. She looks a lot better already."

"Yeah, but there's no point in taking chances."

"Of course. I intend to stay here until she wakes up, if that's what she wants. Thanks for staying, Kanda."

Lenalee stopped breathing for a second. Was this a development? All other noises were tuned out as she waited for Kanda's reply.

"You think I would just leave her alone with you? If there really is something wrong, I don't trust you to be able to handle it."

Allen smiled. "You really do care though, don't you? Enough that you'd watch over her while your only company is me."

"Well… I mean… It's not… so bad…" Kanda started. "Well, I mean, it is, but I don't really mind that much. Or I do, but…"

Allen's eyes grew wide. "What are you trying to say?"

Kanda sighed. "I don't want to fight with you anymore, because it's annoying."

"Me neither. It's tiring and bothers our friends." Allen tried to lighten the situation. "Ha, plus, you're running out of insults for calling me short. Limited vocabulary?"

Allen you idiot, Lenalee thought.

"Are you calling me stupid, bean sprout?"

"Um, well, not exactly."

"I can think of new insults anytime, tiny."

"Oh? Are you just going to insult my height every time? I think you're intelligence, or lack there of, is much more worthy of insults."

"My intelligence is just fine."

"Don't think too hard. You'll sprain your brain."

"That's it! I don't even know why I tried to make even a shred of peace with you! Just thinking about the fact that you still breathe pisses me off."

"Well getting along with you is like getting along with a gorilla! A big stupid ugly gorilla! Lavi must have been a zookeeper earlier in life to be able to be friends with you!"

"The only thing smaller than you is your amount of maturity!"

Allen clenched his fists and his entire body shook. "I hate you!"

A look of surprise mixed with hurt flew across Kanda's face and was quickly replaced with rage. "Well fuck! Same to you!"

Lenalee sat straight up. Her sudden movement startled both of them and they were immediately embarrassed. They'd completely forgotten that she was trying to sleep. Both were preparing for her to scream at them like always, but were met with silence.

"Why?" she whispered.

"I'm so so so sorry, Lenalee. I promise we'll be quiet. You can go back to sleep," Allen said, trying to smooth things over.

"I don't care about sleep. Why? Why won't you two just stop? Why are you both so blind?!" By the last sentence she was shouting. "Do you have any idea how hard it is to watch two people who care for each other fight? Especially when they're your friends!"

"What are you talking abo—"

"Get out!" she shouted at the two. Stunned, they had no choice but to do as she said and leave. The minute they were gone, she grabbed her pillow and screamed into it until she went hoarse.

* * *

"Ah, another beautiful day!"

Yaoi-chan floated down the colorful and vibrant sidewalks of Fairy World. She had only planned on doing a little grocery shopping, but ended up visiting dozens of shops and spending most of what she had. It was so hard with all of the cute clothes they sold! She'd also picked up a few things she knew her friends back home would enjoy.

She breathed in deeply and felt a surge of energy as she floated past the large tower that powered all the wands owned by the fairies. It reminded her that she hadn't used her own power in a while.

"How long has it been? A month?" She pouted. She certainly hoped she didn't start feeling magic build up anytime soon. Or was that only for fairies that acted as godparents? Either way, she felt like she was getting out of shape and that it wasn't healthy how lazy her friends were these days.

A distant shout distracted her. It came a second time and she could make out her name now.

"Yaaaaoooooiiii-chaaaaan!"

In front of a petit café, she could see her brother waving and beckoning her over. Her brother could certainly get on her nerves sometimes, but she hadn't seen him in a while. She floated over and dropped her bags under the table.

"Why haven't you been calling me, my darling sister? Busy with work?"

She sat across from him. "Hardly. It's been almost a month since my last job. I'm not as lucky to get as many calls as you, Brother."

"Well I guess that's not your fault. I am Cupid after all. And let's face it, there are more straight and lesbian couple cases out there on earth than those boy love cases you take on." He smoothed his pale pink hair and adjusted his diaper.

"I can't help that. My powers only work in boy love cases. It's not that I want to sit around and do nothing all day," she protested.

"Ah! That reminds me. Jorgen was looking for you." He cupped his ear towards the rainbow bridge that connected Fairy World to earth. "I hear a reluctant love blooming! Sorry sis, but I must take my leave. Duty calls!" There was a poof and the seat across from Yaoi-chan was empty.

She sighed and stood up. "Well I guess I'd better find—"

Before she finished her sentence, the impossibly huge and intimidating Jorgen von Strangle was standing in front of her table.

"Oh, um, hello Jorgen," she said meekly, barely coming partway up his muscular calf. "I heard you were looking for me."

"Do you know _why_ I've been looking for you?" his voice rumbled in his German accent.

"Um, you missed me?" she joked, hoping that she wasn't in trouble.

He ignored her attempt at humor. "You know the rules around here. Either you're a godparent or you take up a different job to earn your keep. You're way overdue. You and your friends want to keep living in a house, don't they?"

"Y-yes, but, you see, it's not that easy. I can't do my job unless there's a job to be done. I can't just force two boys to fall in love if they don't already have feelings for each other. Jobs come when they come—"

"Well then I hope you have a backup plan because you have one more month to find a job and complete it."

"But sir! Who knows when a job will come along! Not to mention it takes time to do boy love cases, especially if the boys are still convinced that they're straight—"

"I don't care! One month. Either find work or lose the house. You could always come to my military school."

Thankfully, her wand beeped at her just then. "It's Pi-chan!" She pushed a button and spoke to her wand like one would a speaker phone. "Hello?"

"Yaoi-chan! I can feel it! There's a reluctant boy love happening on earth in the country called England!"

"That's good to hear. We need to take that job or we're going to be robbed of house and home."

"But listen to this! I've never felt anything so strong! Not just the love, but the reluctance is so strong that the two actually believe that they hate each other from the depths of their hearts. I just felt our 'host' make the wish too."

"Sounds like a tough job. Do you think we could pull it off in a month?"

"Yeah! No prob! We can do anything!" Yaoi-chan admired Pi-chan's undying enthusiasm.

"Alright. You know what to do then." She pushed another button and slipped her wand back into her pocket. Picking up her bags, she grinned up at Jorgen.

"No need to worry! We just got another job. A really good one."

* * *

Having had her plan fail, Lenalee decided to just stay in her room the rest of the day. Because she'd gotten so little sleep last night, she dozed off for a chunk of the day. Lavi came by once or twice to ask how it'd gone and see if she was alright. She assured him she was fine and thanked him and later he brought her food. You have to at least eat, he told her. She didn't complain. She was really hungry.

Before she knew it, night had fallen and the stars twinkled in through her window. One blinked especially bright at her, like it was calling her. She remembered her brother telling her about wishing upon stars when she was little. It all seemed so ridiculous now. But, what the heck? What did she have to lose now that the situation was hopeless?

She knelt by her window and clasped her hands in a praying position. What should she ask for? How should she ask for it? She decided to keep it simple.

"God? If you are even listening. You see everything, right? Then you probably already know what I'm going to ask. To ask for forced love is impossible, but could you maybe perform some miracle or set up some situation that would make them come out and see the truth? I'm afraid their love for each other will be pushed into the cellars of their hearts forever at this rate and they'll spend the rest of their life regretting and wondering what could have been. Please… help them realize their love…"

She paused for a moment and listened to the silence. She opened one eye and met the complete darkness that surrounded her. Nothing.

Well that was dumb, she thought. She got up and started rummaging for a candle to light. I guess I'll just read until I'm tired, she told herself. And then tomorrow it's back to normal life.

Or that's what she kept telling herself as she slipped into bed and cracked open a book she hadn't read yet. She started reading the first sentence, but something out of the corner of her eye was bothering her. She tried to ignore it, but ended up re-reading the first sentence over and over.

"That's it. What is that?" She slammed the book down on her bed and walked over to her window. There it was. An orb of unusually bright light was bobbing about aimlessly but seemed to bobbing in her general direction.

"A firefly?" She knew it couldn't be. No firefly was that radiant. And there was something in the way it moved…

She put her face closer to the window and the light held still. Then it flew straight at her window and hit the glass with a loud thunk. Lenalee gasped and pulled away. Guess it really was just a firefly, she thought.

But then the light faded a little and she saw that she was very wrong.

A little person about three inches tall was pressed against her window and it looked like she was on the brink of passing out. Lenalee didn't understand, but her instinct to protect kicked in. She threw open the window and pulled the little person in.

"My gosh, are you okay?"

Her eyes widened. The little person was a girl wearing a bright yellow princess dress covered in pale yellow sashes and bows. Her hair matched her dress and was the color of sweet rich honey and she had a sparkling tiara placed atop her head. But what surprised the exorcist the most was the delicate, almost see-through pair of wings on her back. The little person rubbed her head and looked up at Lenalee.

"Ah! Found you! This place has a million windows. But I saw your face and came straight over. Guess I couldn't tell your window was closed, ha!" She rubbed the back of her head and laughed.

A thought crossed Lenalee's mind. She pinched the little person's wings and lifted her up.

"Ow! Ow! What gives? Those are tender you know."

Lenalee squinted her eyes. "You don't work for the Earl, do you? If you do, I'd have to kill you."

"Me? No! I don't even know who you're talking about. I'm here because of the wish you made," she explained.

"The wish I made? You mean the one just now? That's ridiculous. Are you a fairy or something?" the exorcist asked, putting the little person back on her palm only for her to pop into the air and hover in front of her face.

"I'm no fairy! I'm a pixie, thank you very much!"

"You look like a fairy to me."

"That's fair enough. I don't look anything like most pixies."

"What do they normally look like?"

"They've got pointy red hats and sunglasses. Oh, and grey business suits. And their heads are really _square_. Thankfully I was taken in by fairies and my mother was a fairy so I look like this!" she exclaimed with sparkling yellow eyes.

"Sunglasses? Suits? Whatever. Just what did you mean when you said that you're 'here because of the wish I made?'"

"I meant exactly what I said. I have some friends who can help you out. And all you have to do," she pulled a piece of paper from her dress, "is say this."

Lenalee took the small piece of paper and held the candle close to it. "I will do everything and anything in my power or that I am told to bring (insert name here) and—"

"No! You gotta say their names. Their full names," the pixie interjected.

"Ok then. I will do everything and anything in my power or that I am told to bring Allen Walker and Yuu Kanda together in holy loveyness? Is that even a word?"

"Probably not, but who cares? Congrats! We'll make your wish come true now that you've signed the contract with your voice."

"Contract? You didn't say this was a contract! And what do you mean 'we?' You're the only one I see here."

"Now is not the time. You'll find out soon enough. Now just go to sleep."

"Wait, I still don't get—"

The pixie threw sand at her face and before she knew it she'd fallen onto her bed and into deep sleep. "Phew! Good thing the sand man lent me this sand. I'll have to stop by his mattress store later and pick up some more. Sleep tight, our sweet host!"

And with a flash of pixels mixed with a poof, she was gone.

* * *

She didn't even dream. Her sleep had been deeper than any she'd ever experienced before and she could have almost sworn that she was dead.

"Ugh. Why is there so much crust in my eyes?" she wondered aloud as she wiped away the remaining sand in her eyes. Her side hurt and she found that it was because she'd slept on her book all night.

Wait a second. Would she just leave a book lying on her bed? She looked at the front cover and couldn't remember getting further than the first sentence.

It was then that she remembered. A pixie had come into her room last night! And aside from that, she'd promised to grant her wish! Never mind what she thought earlier. She really did dream. But it didn't make sense. She knew herself better than to just collapse into sleep without putting the book away.

"You're awake!"

Lenalee screamed and threw her book in the direction of the voice. "Who's there? This better not be one of your pranks, Lavi. Hello?"

From the foot of her bed, another small person (but significantly bigger than the pixie) floated up with a disapproving look. "That was dangerous you know. That book could have hit me." The little person was wearing a sparkling dress with various shades of pink. On either side of her chest were two rainbows and on the lower half of her dress were two male arrow symbols linked together and two upside-down pink triangles overlapping each other. Her hair was short, a little shorter than Allen's, and was an overbearing hot pink. In her hand was a wand with a red heart at the tip. On her head was a gold crown with the same heart on the front. And just like the pixie the night before, two fragile wings poked out from her back.

"Another pixie?" Lenalee asked, wondering if she was still asleep.

"Oh, no. I'm a fairy. But Pi-chan is here too." The pixie from the night before poof-pixeled onto the fairy's shoulder. "Yoohoo! We're here to grant your wish!"

"Yeah, and just who are you? My fairy godmother?" Lenalee asked sarcastically.

"Heavens no. Do you have any idea how hard it is being a godparent? And we don't have that kind of power anyway. We can only grant boy love wishes. Let me introduce the rest of the team!"

Three other fairies floated up from the foot of her bed and stood in formation.

"Love troubles?" Pi-chan asked. "Look no further!"

"The BL Fairy team has the answer to all your romantic—" Yaoi-chan started.

"—and passionate needs," the red one finished.

"Just show us the boys—" the green one started.

"—and we'll work our magic!" the blue one finished.

"My name is Yaoi-chan and I'm the Yaoi Fairy. I will help them find their true feelings and soften their hearts," Yaoi-chan explained.

"My name is Horny-chan and I'm the Horny Fairy. Let's just say I help them into the more 'intimate' part of their relationship." Horny-chan had ruby red hair that brushed her shoulders with matching eyes and lips. She was wearing a sleeveless high-collar black shirt that exposed her midriff and a ruffled scarlet miniskirt and strapped heels to finish it off. In her hand was a wand with a big black censor bar at the end. On her head was another golden crown but hers had two male bathroom door figures um… playing leapfrog? In her hair was a cute hair clip that looked suspiciously like—

"Oh my god, is that a penis?" Lenalee asked.

"Yeah, you like?" Horny-chan asked.

"And your shirt. Are those two boys kissing?"

"Yup! These are the two boys from our previous job. The one with orange hair is Ichigo Kurosaki and the one with white hair is Toshiro Hitsugaya."

The green one stepped in front of her. "And she has me to thank for that shirt. My name is Porn-kun and I'm the Porn Fairy. I take pictures of the boys' more romantic moments and keep them on file. And I make some great merchandise out of them too." The only boy fairy there, he looked more like a joker than a fairy. His hair was messy and a deep forest green and his green eyes were even darker. Two black upside-down triangles sat beneath both of his eyes and extended down to his jaw. Pink lip gloss made his lips sparkle and mascara deepened his thick eyelashes. He wore a black choker around his thin pale neck. He had on a one-piece joker suit in different shades of green that was long-sleeved on one side and sleeveless on the other and it was the same way for the leggings. Pointed shoes fit snugly on his feet. A giant hole in the suit exposed his stomach and a sparkling black navel piercing. In his hand was a wand with a small camera at the tip. On his head, instead of a crown, was a jester hat the same colors as his suit. And instead of the thin wings the others had, he had black wings that looked like they belonged to a bat. "I know I look a little different, but that's because I'm an anti-fairy. But don't worry, I'm a good one."

"And last but not least, there's me," the blue one said, taking the stage. "My name is Doujin-chan and I'm the Doujinshi Fairy. I observe the boys' journey from step one and record it all in doujinshi form."

"You mean like a bookman?" Lenalee asked.

"Yes, that's one way to look at it. The only difference is instead of looking upon things with no emotion, I must get _into_ the emotions of the boys to convey their story in my doujinshi. You could also call me a scribe or an official record keeper along with Porn-kun." She had sapphire hair pulled back into a ponytail and (like the others) matching eyes. Her dress was baby blue and reached her mid-thigh. Her knee-high boots were the same color and her right boot had an anklet with a star charm. Her dress had a high collar and on her chest were a pencil and a Momo eraser. Her long sleeves led down to white gloves. In one gloved hand, she held a long mechanical pencil with a star and the top and she had a sketch book tucked under her arm. A matching sketchbook was painted onto her golden crown and small gold hoops hung from her earlobes.

"Now that we've introduced ourselves, it's your turn, host!" Yaoi-chan said.

"Host?"

"Yes, that means you're the human that we stick to during our job. You give us information on the boys and use your connections to them to help our plan. And so we'd like to know your name and more about you."

"Um, my name is Lenalee. Lenalee Lee. I'm Allen and Kanda's friend and co-worker."

"Okay, Lenalee. Now, before you start fretting, the only people who can see us are you and anyone with any special connections to magic or fairies and those are _very rare._ Now then, take us to the boys and let's begin! We have a month to complete the job."

Lenalee nodded. She'd finally gotten over how weird this was (she'd seen plenty of weird things in her life) and started getting excited. These were _fairies_. They had to be able to do what she couldn't. "Sure. Just follow me." She got up and opened her door to find Lavi standing there, getting ready to knock.

"Good morning, Lavi," she said nervously. He can't see them. Be calm.

"You mean good afternoon. You were sleeping for forever. Everyone was starting to get worried."

"I'm sorry. I'm up now, so I'll just be going to find the others now." She tried to push her way past Lavi and escape but stopped when she heard him yelp. He was staring right at where the fairies and Pi-chan were floating.

Lavi was almost pale.

"Lenalee, are those… fairies?"

And, cut! That's the end of chapter one. This whole time I was worrying that it would be too short, but I managed to reach page 19, which is good. I generally like my chapters to be about twenty pages or so. However, don't expect so much from NurikoKurosaki. She is a LAZY ASS. So I can't promise when chapter two will be up, but I promise to kick her butt around until she writes it. So what do y'all think so far? Good? Bad? Great? Horrible? You know you want to answer! So please do so in this handy little thing called a review. Reviews are the only way we know that you're reading and the only way we'll feel the need to keep writing. And in case anyone was wondering, the fairies are based off of our friends. My fairy is Yaoi-chan and NurikoKurosaki's is Horny-chan and the others are three of our wonderful friends.

Yaoi-chan: See you next time! Shugo shugo!

Me: Dangit Yaoi, you're a fairy, not a Shugo Chara.

Yaoi-chan: I know…


End file.
